I have a stamen phobia, which I need to get over because they look so awesome. Maybe I just need to accept that mine just aren't going to look like Carolyn/Fireglass's!
My main problem is that I get fogging between the layers of clear. I find it helps to warm the stamen cane tip SLIGHTLY before plunging... It should be hot but hard. I'm also trying to find the right heat level for the base bead, so it plunges deep without mushrooming inside, and without blowing a huge hole in the flower. I keep getting discouraged and giving up... I should just practice more on small flowers before experimenting on my huge ones!
For cane, I have been making pre-encased components (and/or using filigrana) and stacking them. I find this keeps each stamen-bit round instead of flat. I still have a long way to go in terms of proportion, though! It's so easy to make things so skinny they fade to nothing...